Friday, January 29, 2010

i miss u so much that it hurts

"cause u know i'd walk a thousand miles if i could just see u tonight"
Vanessa Carlton - Thousand Miles

sometimes i just cant bear the fact that we r miles away separated. i just realise that all these days, i have never done with it, i am just err.. running away. help me, comfort me, my feet is just too tired to run, my heart is just too tired to bleed, and my body is just too tired to pretend. i have failed to smile whenever i wake up cause i realise that it is just another same days without looking u in the eye. i am putting my mask down and u can see that i have never been strong, i was just pretending that i am. two years ahead. two years. two years ahead to live as a pretender. nevermind, life is always fake anyway. The fact is when u cry, when u even grout, the world will still revolve and too bad, it does not revolve on u. grass will still be green, violets will still be blue, life will keep on going, and he will still be a continent away. i can only force my self to believe that everything will be beautiful in His time. it is true.

"Kesabaran berbuah manis" - Ciko

happy Australian Day guys :)

went to mount Nebo for the Australian Days, and did the 2 km hiking. not quite a hiking though, it was more like an evening walk, and photograph session. lol. i dont know. soo damn exhausted , eventhough mine is not really tough actually. 2 km walk was just nothing compared to the guys who have successfully done the 5skm walk. how was the 'waterfall' my dear fellas? LOL

Thursday, January 28, 2010

am i too small? or did i do something wrong?

maybe the thing is,
no matter how hard i try,
n how i am dying to make my self adequate,
no, i wont ever ever be good enough to deserve what i think i deserve.

tell me, what am i supposed to do?

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

fit in

every feet has their own shoes to fit. so please, try to stand on my shoes, and walk with them for miles.
then u may judge

Friday, January 22, 2010

fake smile

God, are You hiding somewhere? Your daughter is lost

beer will always do me good

had incredibly great lunch with the girls with garlic bread as our entree and a cheesecake, carrotcake, and mudcake afterwards. also had a beatiful dumpling beside casino in the evening. then finally had a chiller moment at The Beach House in the midnigt, indeed, ended up with jars of beer and wedges. i was deff fattening my self. i feel like walking home.

"People come and go. when they are gone, it means their duties in your life are over. but some of them are still there in your heart no matter how far and how long they've been gone. " - Joan

u can see the fireworks up in the sky, yet not on my face

the nye of mine was a blast one. but still, smthing is missing without having it all around with my parents. seriously, i never know that new year can be this gloomy without them

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

new year resolution

1. treat people like i want to be treated:
- stop canceling things last minute
- be more sensitive
- try not to please everybody
- respect people more
- stop judging people
- be good to all, cause everybody is unique.
they cant help that they r annoying :p
*common sense, be good to receive better. karma does exist!
2. better GPA.
* please God, i beg u. this is crucial for my next study plan.
3. serve You more,
with a grateful heart, for your glory, not mine :)
4. spread my wings, n stop dishing off opportunities
build connection, get out of my comfort zone, i know i have to!
- prepare my CV n cover letter, take every volunteer job that has come to my ibox
6. stop bluffing about my future plan
i have learned so much that the more i talk about it, the more impossible for it to come true
7. be more faithful, more understanding so we can make it works boo? :)

frankly, i hate making new year resolution, cause i know it wont work. lol. oh gee, so this wud be one of my resolution, my last resolution is:
8. make all of my resolutions come true

Friday, January 1, 2010

case of immortality

source: i can read