Thursday, September 29, 2011


the worse feeling is when you finally reach the extent of wanting something really bad for a very long period of time, just to know that it is not for you to have.

in the end

and in the end, it is me who will feel lost. cus the attachment between us, is not even.
this is what kills me the most. knowing that you can still feel fine, without me being around.


i dont need to know why or what is inside your mind. all i need to know is that i gotta stop trying.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

heaven and hell

as i grow older my eyes are wide open to see that you dont love people from the way they look, it is far beyond physical perfection. those kind of attraction wont last long and that kind of love will vanish as time goes by. for what you see in your eyes may fade away when their true colour shown. the greater feeling comes when your logic cant seem to find the reason why, when you fight like no one else but still care anyway, when you are blinded by their ability to solve riddle you cant solve, and when physical imperfection no longer counts. it simply when everything becomes irrational.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011


one of those nights when you are too tired but you cant sleep.
one of those nights when you know you cant be juggler no more.
one of those nights when you need someone to talk to but no one listens but the wall.
one of those nights when you realise the only people who cares for you are miles away.
one of those nights when you keep prioritising the one who just made you as an option.
one of those nights when you need to make decision but u dont even know what u want.
one of those nights when even your parents cant give you good advise and leaving all the rest to you.

those stupid same nights.

you bleed just to know that you still have heart.
you bleed just to understand what goes wrong.
you bleed yourself trying.

nobody could see the lonesome beneath all those laughter and hard work.
and between those city lights and sky crapper,
you cant help but being fragile.

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Friday, September 16, 2011


i might not be the prettiest, but i deserve respect as well.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

acting fool

a part of me never gave up on the idea that we would finally come together eventually. cus we are connected, we always will be.

Monday, September 12, 2011


some people understand, some people dont. and i dont fucking care if you dont. try to stand on my shoes, then u may judge.

Friday, September 9, 2011


how are you? are you happy? and how's life so far without me? do u miss me?


dont be too attached to someone. cus u cant guarantee the amount of attachment will always be equally the same. people leave eventually, remember?

Wednesday, September 7, 2011


i am a rookie juggler. no doubt. there is a time i feel like giving up facing all those massive workload. there is a time i think i cannot keep up, and there is a time i feel like a clown. but after all, nothing beats the feeling when i am finally succeed in managing the balance right. there is a time i hate being me, but i know deep down in my heart, i love my life.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

great loss

just lost one of my greatest motivator. currently hating life and its immortality.