prayer

Dear God,
i know You have been watching me like forever and You can see, how my pride hurted. i thank You for the people who have been so nice to me, for the chances that You have given for me. and i thank You, For the people that have been taking me for granted for some reasons, people who have been ignoring my thought, people who never take me seriously because of my limitation, because of my incapability. God, i beg You, heal me. Give me understanding that we, human, have our own part in this world.

Dear God,
You know how hurted it is when You feel like You cant count on anybody but Yourself. I know it feels like i forget to be grateful for people that You have given to me to help me. You know what it is about God, You know it so well. Words cant describe how i feel. You see beyond my heart. You see my tears during the night, and no one hears. i should have known that i cant count on nobody but You. not even the one that i always look up to Forgive me God. Forgive me that i prefer to count on something that i think more real than You. Who am i to think that You are surreal.

Dear God,
i will be one year older in few days, and i feel like i am supposed to feel special or something. no, i dont. i have this big dark shadow in my heart called emptiness. i cant move on. i simply cant.
anyway, 20 is a big deal, i dont think im ready to have this number in my forehead. Give me wisdom God, You know that im not even close to it. no im not.

Dear God,
You know what bothers me the most lately. You know how this future thingy has scared me like totally. You know how afraid i am not to finally get what i have been working for. You know how terrified i am not to have things i want the most. You know it all God. stand by me, give me the strength and serenity to accept things i cannot control. You know that world does not revolve around me that i cant always get what i always wanted. God, i need more strength, cause im just a human, fragile.

Dear God,
as usual, words fail me. if only i could talk to You face to face, like bestfriends always do. if only You could hug me and whisper me that everything is gonna be allright. Cause now, i desperately need one.

nb: what took You so long to heal me? is it inappropriate to ask for an instant healing?

thank You
Amen.

prayer

Dear God,
i know You have been watching me like forever and You can see, how my pride hurted. i thank You for the people who have been so nice to me, for the chances that You have given for me. and i thank You, For the people that have been taking me for granted for some reasons, people who have been ignoring my thought, people who never take me seriously because of my limitation, because of my incapability. God, i beg You, heal me. Give me understanding that we, human, have our own part in this world.

Dear God,
You know how hurted it is when You feel like You cant count on anybody but Yourself. I know it feels like i forget to be grateful for people that You have given to me to help me. You know what it is about God, You know it so well. Words cant describe how i feel. You see beyond my heart. You see my tears during the night, and no one hears. i should have known that i cant count on nobody but You. not even the one that i always look up to Forgive me God. Forgive me that i prefer to count on something that i think more real than You. Who am i to think that You are surreal.

Dear God,
i will be one year older in few days, and i feel like i am supposed to feel special or something. no, i dont. i have this big dark shadow in my heart called emptiness. i cant move on. i simply cant.
anyway, 20 is a big deal, i dont think im ready to have this number in my forehead. Give me wisdom God, You know that im not even close to it. no im not.

Dear God,
You know what bothers me the most lately. You know how this future thingy has scared me like totally. You know how afraid i am not to finally get what i have been working for. You know how terrified i am not to have things i want the most. You know it all God. stand by me, give me the strength and serenity to accept things i cannot control. You know that world does not revolve around me that i cant always get what i always wanted. God, i need more strength, cause im just a human, fragile.

Dear God,
as usual, words fail me. if only i could talk to You face to face, like bestfriends always do. if only You could hug me and whisper me that everything is gonna be allright. Cause now, i desperately need one.

nb: what took You so long to heal me? is it inappropriate to ask for an instant healing?

thank You
Amen.

The Promotor

for more information www.idolabrisbane.com

The Promotor

for more information www.idolabrisbane.com

bleeds

...

E: How can i convince you?
A: Just stay here and be with me
E: i will. in 2 years time
A: its way too long you know
E: girl, i need you to understand
A: well ..
E: till then, i beg you to never let me go

bleeds

...

E: How can i convince you?
A: Just stay here and be with me
E: i will. in 2 years time
A: its way too long you know
E: girl, i need you to understand
A: well ..
E: till then, i beg you to never let me go

Brisbane Racing Festival

it was bloody hot back then. but i insanely enjoy every second of it. not because it was hot but simply because it was completely fun. not being exaggerating, but yea. had heaps of fun :D

Brisbane Racing Festival

it was bloody hot back then. but i insanely enjoy every second of it. not because it was hot but simply because it was completely fun. not being exaggerating, but yea. had heaps of fun :D

inconsistency

when i was like 5, i really want to be
1. architect
2. astronout
3. radio announcer
4. pilot

n now age almost 20, i really want to be
1. advertising copywriter
2. music video director
3. radio announcer
4. personal shopper

i found 2 things in common there *drum rolls

1. i have four dreams, not actually one. we supposed to be having only one dream to make it focus ey? that is the inconsistency of what i want to be until now which equals to me completely have no idea of what i actually want even at this stage, when i supposed to be sure about it
2. i wanted and still want to be a radio announcer. but screw that, online media kills the radio star. radio is soo traditional way of media, now is the era of online media. *long sigh.

inconsistency

when i was like 5, i really want to be
1. architect
2. astronout
3. radio announcer
4. pilot

n now age almost 20, i really want to be
1. advertising copywriter
2. music video director
3. radio announcer
4. personal shopper

i found 2 things in common there *drum rolls

1. i have four dreams, not actually one. we supposed to be having only one dream to make it focus ey? that is the inconsistency of what i want to be until now which equals to me completely have no idea of what i actually want even at this stage, when i supposed to be sure about it
2. i wanted and still want to be a radio announcer. but screw that, online media kills the radio star. radio is soo traditional way of media, now is the era of online media. *long sigh.

an early morning slap

early conversation back then

Blanche : what have u been up to these days Adhis? havent heard from u for so long
Me : everything seems chaos Blanche :'( miss hanging around with youuu
Blanche : why? what could be going wrong in your wonderful life? you have heaps of achievements, a gorgeous boyfriend, your mom come to visit not long ago, surrounded by good friends, good grades. whats wrong?
Me : well, uhhmm ooh..

so the problem is just me then
i should have answered her:
"nothing Blanche, i just forget how to be grateful"

and i keep playing dramaqueen

an early morning slap

early conversation back then

Blanche : what have u been up to these days Adhis? havent heard from u for so long
Me : everything seems chaos Blanche :'( miss hanging around with youuu
Blanche : why? what could be going wrong in your wonderful life? you have heaps of achievements, a gorgeous boyfriend, your mom come to visit not long ago, surrounded by good friends, good grades. whats wrong?
Me : well, uhhmm ooh..

so the problem is just me then
i should have answered her:
"nothing Blanche, i just forget how to be grateful"

and i keep playing dramaqueen

the art of being grateful

For every accomplishment that i have got, i feel guilty for keep complaining. but believe me, this thing is not as great as u guys see from the outside. i just cant help for murmuring. one thing that starts waking me up from the dream is when one of my friend said "ah elo mah kapan sih ga galau?" frankly, i hate it when he's right. and he's always right. UGH.

anyway, maybe its me, yang udah lupa gimana caranya bersyukur. being here, healthy, active oh yea what can gone wrong? a lot, i tell u.

have u ever felt like everything is gone wrong but u dont know what exactly it is? it happens to me.

the art of being grateful

For every accomplishment that i have got, i feel guilty for keep complaining. but believe me, this thing is not as great as u guys see from the outside. i just cant help for murmuring. one thing that starts waking me up from the dream is when one of my friend said "ah elo mah kapan sih ga galau?" frankly, i hate it when he's right. and he's always right. UGH.

anyway, maybe its me, yang udah lupa gimana caranya bersyukur. being here, healthy, active oh yea what can gone wrong? a lot, i tell u.

have u ever felt like everything is gone wrong but u dont know what exactly it is? it happens to me.

Story Bridge

The 30 ambassadors got the chance to climb the Story Bridge.

Apa sih Story Bridge? Story Bridge itu salah satu jembatan terkenal di Brisbane yang terletak di Kangoroo Point. So by seeing the picture above, can u imagine how awesome is that to be in the top of the Story Bridge? seeing the whole Brisbane from the top of it? i can proudly say, I HAVE BEEN THERE. thanks to Study Brisbane yang udah kasi kesempatan buat ambasador-ambasadornya ada di atas sana.

Penasaran kan? come visit Brisbane. the city that has so many things to offer ;)

Story Bridge

The 30 ambassadors got the chance to climb the Story Bridge.

Apa sih Story Bridge? Story Bridge itu salah satu jembatan terkenal di Brisbane yang terletak di Kangoroo Point. So by seeing the picture above, can u imagine how awesome is that to be in the top of the Story Bridge? seeing the whole Brisbane from the top of it? i can proudly say, I HAVE BEEN THERE. thanks to Study Brisbane yang udah kasi kesempatan buat ambasador-ambasadornya ada di atas sana.

Penasaran kan? come visit Brisbane. the city that has so many things to offer ;)

Brisbane Student Ambassador 2010

Formal Induction Ceremony with Brisbane Lord Mayor Campbell Newman

yes, the bittersweet phobia got into the 30 Brisbane International Student Ambassador. how magical it is? i completely thank God for the opportunity that He has given to me. just like old days, the quote that reminds me to be humble "Great power comes great responsibility"

Jadi teman-teman Indonesia yang ingin tahu lebih banyak tentang Brisbane, dan yang ingin tanya-tanya bagaimana rasanya hidup di Brisbane, kuliah/sekolah di Brisbane, bisa click di TANYA AMBASSADOR, dan saya sebagai Brisbane Student Ambassador yang baru siap menjawab dan share pengalaman-pengalaman saya di sini.

o btw, this is the official news article:
http://www.studybrisbane.com.au/study/About/News-Article.aspx?id=13178&returnurl=~/Study/About/NewsAndMedia.aspx

in addition to all that, I even got into The Australian and Courier Mail as well.

how cool is that ? :D

Brisbane Student Ambassador 2010

Formal Induction Ceremony with Brisbane Lord Mayor Campbell Newman

yes, the bittersweet phobia got into the 30 Brisbane International Student Ambassador. how magical it is? i completely thank God for the opportunity that He has given to me. just like old days, the quote that reminds me to be humble "Great power comes great responsibility"

Jadi teman-teman Indonesia yang ingin tahu lebih banyak tentang Brisbane, dan yang ingin tanya-tanya bagaimana rasanya hidup di Brisbane, kuliah/sekolah di Brisbane, bisa click di TANYA AMBASSADOR, dan saya sebagai Brisbane Student Ambassador yang baru siap menjawab dan share pengalaman-pengalaman saya di sini.

o btw, this is the official news article:
http://www.studybrisbane.com.au/study/About/News-Article.aspx?id=13178&returnurl=~/Study/About/NewsAndMedia.aspx

in addition to all that, I even got into The Australian and Courier Mail as well.

how cool is that ? :D

hey distance,

which one of us that you think is going to give up first?

hey distance,

which one of us that you think is going to give up first?

reality bites

"life is under no obligation to give us what we expect."
margaret mitchell

just because reality is far from your dream, doesn't mean you have to hate waking.
just because someone fails to do something, doesn't mean they r not worth keeping.
i'm struggling to keep my eyes open to the alternative reality of things, trying not expect anything out of anybody else but myself.
.ribbonyboo.

ps: dammit, it is soo true

reality bites

"life is under no obligation to give us what we expect."
margaret mitchell

just because reality is far from your dream, doesn't mean you have to hate waking.
just because someone fails to do something, doesn't mean they r not worth keeping.
i'm struggling to keep my eyes open to the alternative reality of things, trying not expect anything out of anybody else but myself.
.ribbonyboo.

ps: dammit, it is soo true

here we go again

no matter how well we plan everything, life has its own plan for us. it is beyond our control, our power. u might be dissapointed. but as shit as it is, it happens. people keep bluffing around that nobody is perfect, but as pathetic as it is, people keep forcing us to be perfect. just like when it is wrong to be expert and it is also wrong to be less than that. human logic can be inlogical sometimes. God, whyd u have to create it soo complicated? just like life, u make it far more complicated. or maybe u know something that i dont know? yea right. what do i know?

here we go again

no matter how well we plan everything, life has its own plan for us. it is beyond our control, our power. u might be dissapointed. but as shit as it is, it happens. people keep bluffing around that nobody is perfect, but as pathetic as it is, people keep forcing us to be perfect. just like when it is wrong to be expert and it is also wrong to be less than that. human logic can be inlogical sometimes. God, whyd u have to create it soo complicated? just like life, u make it far more complicated. or maybe u know something that i dont know? yea right. what do i know?

intersection

I shout to the sea, and finally the wave stops and seems like staring on my eyes, trying to calm me down. Is it me or is it true. Eventhough the sea doesn look very usual, i keep on denying. Is it me or is it not. The sea and the fire dont have things in common. But simply, it takes more than commonest to blend.

by the way, i have been always wondering. how does it feel? to be in the moon. to be able to walk on it, day by day. will it be as beautiful as what i see from the earth? or is it far more beautiful? what i only know is i used to dream of it. years ago.

If only the moon were close to the earth. I would be able to reach it and feel its beauty. I wont need to find the sea, trying to find the reflection of the moon. it is just because i cant reach the moon, literally.

I know iam not that strong enough to get on to the sea anyway. I mean, come on. i hate water. And unfortunately sea is a big place covered up with water. This place is just not for me. i keep ensuring my self that.

But then i realise, now i get to see it through my apartment's window, eventually. only by looking out through my window, i can see the moon. it is just more than a girl could ask for. why do i need to so demanding anyway? it is here, in front of me. even u cant touch it, u still can feel it. nonetheless its far away.

intersection

I shout to the sea, and finally the wave stops and seems like staring on my eyes, trying to calm me down. Is it me or is it true. Eventhough the sea doesn look very usual, i keep on denying. Is it me or is it not. The sea and the fire dont have things in common. But simply, it takes more than commonest to blend.

by the way, i have been always wondering. how does it feel? to be in the moon. to be able to walk on it, day by day. will it be as beautiful as what i see from the earth? or is it far more beautiful? what i only know is i used to dream of it. years ago.

If only the moon were close to the earth. I would be able to reach it and feel its beauty. I wont need to find the sea, trying to find the reflection of the moon. it is just because i cant reach the moon, literally.

I know iam not that strong enough to get on to the sea anyway. I mean, come on. i hate water. And unfortunately sea is a big place covered up with water. This place is just not for me. i keep ensuring my self that.

But then i realise, now i get to see it through my apartment's window, eventually. only by looking out through my window, i can see the moon. it is just more than a girl could ask for. why do i need to so demanding anyway? it is here, in front of me. even u cant touch it, u still can feel it. nonetheless its far away.

stranger

there's a stranger, who had been so dumb enough to get into the game even people have warned her before. there's a stranger, who had been soo arrogant, thinking that she was different and she could make it til the end. no one could ever stop her, even the storm strikes so bad. there's a stranger, who flied too high with her expectation but fell of by the gravitation. she should have known that the sky has the limit and her heart has its own bound. She tested her own patience and get burned by her own curiosity. n now she is dying. dying by her own mind, dying by the endless pain and now dying to leave. but it is too late. the doors have been closed, and there's no way that she could leave the circle.

stranger

there's a stranger, who had been so dumb enough to get into the game even people have warned her before. there's a stranger, who had been soo arrogant, thinking that she was different and she could make it til the end. no one could ever stop her, even the storm strikes so bad. there's a stranger, who flied too high with her expectation but fell of by the gravitation. she should have known that the sky has the limit and her heart has its own bound. She tested her own patience and get burned by her own curiosity. n now she is dying. dying by her own mind, dying by the endless pain and now dying to leave. but it is too late. the doors have been closed, and there's no way that she could leave the circle.