SOS

where are you when i need you? yes. you and You. apparently im a single fighter indeed.

SOS

where are you when i need you? yes. you and You. apparently im a single fighter indeed.

a goodbye

it is sad to see your best friend goes into different direction and knowing that you cant follow them. and it completely breaks your heart when you realise that your best friend, is no longer your best. it is funny when we used to share things and spend hours talking about almost everything, but now, we are just completely strangers. dont you know that it hurts to see that nothing left from you but a cold back? then walk, walk away. memories are fading and it is no longer my lost. Iam trying to adjust and move on. cause life goes on.

thank you for everything,
we remain good friends.

a goodbye

it is sad to see your best friend goes into different direction and knowing that you cant follow them. and it completely breaks your heart when you realise that your best friend, is no longer your best. it is funny when we used to share things and spend hours talking about almost everything, but now, we are just completely strangers. dont you know that it hurts to see that nothing left from you but a cold back? then walk, walk away. memories are fading and it is no longer my lost. Iam trying to adjust and move on. cause life goes on.

thank you for everything,
we remain good friends.

i come to You

Dear God
How i miss talking to You God. I have been acting so arrogant thinking that i do not need talking to You. I have been acting unfaithfully, thinking that talking to You will not solve any problem, will not make things better. Forgive me God.

Dear God
I cannot find any words to explain how fragile i am. The storm inside my head. I barely can figure it out. Things happen. and i am too blind to see.

Dear God
Why do you have to make everything immortal. Something good never lasts forever. So why do we have to live if everything will meet its end?

Dear God
Words fail me. Amen.

"di saat iman mu goyah, disitulah iman mu dikuatkan dhis"
a friend that im pretty sure dont want his name to be mentioned here.

i come to You

Dear God
How i miss talking to You God. I have been acting so arrogant thinking that i do not need talking to You. I have been acting unfaithfully, thinking that talking to You will not solve any problem, will not make things better. Forgive me God.

Dear God
I cannot find any words to explain how fragile i am. The storm inside my head. I barely can figure it out. Things happen. and i am too blind to see.

Dear God
Why do you have to make everything immortal. Something good never lasts forever. So why do we have to live if everything will meet its end?

Dear God
Words fail me. Amen.

"di saat iman mu goyah, disitulah iman mu dikuatkan dhis"
a friend that im pretty sure dont want his name to be mentioned here.

a glimpse of sorry

for those who often say that time heels, must have not known the power of sorry.

thus, i just want to say. i forgive u. even it takes more than 2 years for you to come to me and say sorry. oh well its better than nothing.

a glimpse of sorry

for those who often say that time heels, must have not known the power of sorry.

thus, i just want to say. i forgive u. even it takes more than 2 years for you to come to me and say sorry. oh well its better than nothing.

stars

guess what?
i was featured on page 10 of City Magazine and City News

dad, this one is for you
to make you proud :)

love,
ur darling daughter

stars

guess what?
i was featured on page 10 of City Magazine and City News

dad, this one is for you
to make you proud :)

love,
ur darling daughter

the world bites

i know that God is trying to put me into something, testing me on something. to learn, to grow, to be fruitful, by putting me in the bottom of everything.
for the very first time, i am not able to control things.
for the very first time, i am enable to get what i want.
for the very first time, people take me for granted.
my pride hurt, and i fall.
the world moves on, and it doesnt bring me along with it.
simply because it runs, and i remain walking.

im about to fall from grace, and you are not there to lift me up
oh i forgot. ur never there

the world bites

i know that God is trying to put me into something, testing me on something. to learn, to grow, to be fruitful, by putting me in the bottom of everything.
for the very first time, i am not able to control things.
for the very first time, i am enable to get what i want.
for the very first time, people take me for granted.
my pride hurt, and i fall.
the world moves on, and it doesnt bring me along with it.
simply because it runs, and i remain walking.

im about to fall from grace, and you are not there to lift me up
oh i forgot. ur never there

mars n venus

sometime in twitter
naftaliaadhis moon can somehow be distant and cold. oh well, like Mars even has a moon. does it hav stars instead?
hanya_joan @naftaliaadhis at least Mars could be sweet and nice though its far away from venus. Venus sometime nvr know how Mars missing bein wit Venus

words fail me ...

mars n venus

sometime in twitter
naftaliaadhis moon can somehow be distant and cold. oh well, like Mars even has a moon. does it hav stars instead?
hanya_joan @naftaliaadhis at least Mars could be sweet and nice though its far away from venus. Venus sometime nvr know how Mars missing bein wit Venus

words fail me ...

back off

for you who have set me as ur checking point of ur achievement, you who have set me as your objective to beat me in the first place, please, for the love of God, leave me alone. and i would completely appreciate if you dont bring my name for comparison in every achievement u have got.

back off

for you who have set me as ur checking point of ur achievement, you who have set me as your objective to beat me in the first place, please, for the love of God, leave me alone. and i would completely appreciate if you dont bring my name for comparison in every achievement u have got.

favor to ask

God, ive been doing a long distance relationship with my boyfriend and it is incredibly suck. please, I dont want to do it with You.

favor to ask

God, ive been doing a long distance relationship with my boyfriend and it is incredibly suck. please, I dont want to do it with You.

prayer

Dear God,
i know You have been watching me like forever and You can see, how my pride hurted. i thank You for the people who have been so nice to me, for the chances that You have given for me. and i thank You, For the people that have been taking me for granted for some reasons, people who have been ignoring my thought, people who never take me seriously because of my limitation, because of my incapability. God, i beg You, heal me. Give me understanding that we, human, have our own part in this world.

Dear God,
You know how hurted it is when You feel like You cant count on anybody but Yourself. I know it feels like i forget to be grateful for people that You have given to me to help me. You know what it is about God, You know it so well. Words cant describe how i feel. You see beyond my heart. You see my tears during the night, and no one hears. i should have known that i cant count on nobody but You. not even the one that i always look up to Forgive me God. Forgive me that i prefer to count on something that i think more real than You. Who am i to think that You are surreal.

Dear God,
i will be one year older in few days, and i feel like i am supposed to feel special or something. no, i dont. i have this big dark shadow in my heart called emptiness. i cant move on. i simply cant.
anyway, 20 is a big deal, i dont think im ready to have this number in my forehead. Give me wisdom God, You know that im not even close to it. no im not.

Dear God,
You know what bothers me the most lately. You know how this future thingy has scared me like totally. You know how afraid i am not to finally get what i have been working for. You know how terrified i am not to have things i want the most. You know it all God. stand by me, give me the strength and serenity to accept things i cannot control. You know that world does not revolve around me that i cant always get what i always wanted. God, i need more strength, cause im just a human, fragile.

Dear God,
as usual, words fail me. if only i could talk to You face to face, like bestfriends always do. if only You could hug me and whisper me that everything is gonna be allright. Cause now, i desperately need one.

nb: what took You so long to heal me? is it inappropriate to ask for an instant healing?

thank You
Amen.

prayer

Dear God,
i know You have been watching me like forever and You can see, how my pride hurted. i thank You for the people who have been so nice to me, for the chances that You have given for me. and i thank You, For the people that have been taking me for granted for some reasons, people who have been ignoring my thought, people who never take me seriously because of my limitation, because of my incapability. God, i beg You, heal me. Give me understanding that we, human, have our own part in this world.

Dear God,
You know how hurted it is when You feel like You cant count on anybody but Yourself. I know it feels like i forget to be grateful for people that You have given to me to help me. You know what it is about God, You know it so well. Words cant describe how i feel. You see beyond my heart. You see my tears during the night, and no one hears. i should have known that i cant count on nobody but You. not even the one that i always look up to Forgive me God. Forgive me that i prefer to count on something that i think more real than You. Who am i to think that You are surreal.

Dear God,
i will be one year older in few days, and i feel like i am supposed to feel special or something. no, i dont. i have this big dark shadow in my heart called emptiness. i cant move on. i simply cant.
anyway, 20 is a big deal, i dont think im ready to have this number in my forehead. Give me wisdom God, You know that im not even close to it. no im not.

Dear God,
You know what bothers me the most lately. You know how this future thingy has scared me like totally. You know how afraid i am not to finally get what i have been working for. You know how terrified i am not to have things i want the most. You know it all God. stand by me, give me the strength and serenity to accept things i cannot control. You know that world does not revolve around me that i cant always get what i always wanted. God, i need more strength, cause im just a human, fragile.

Dear God,
as usual, words fail me. if only i could talk to You face to face, like bestfriends always do. if only You could hug me and whisper me that everything is gonna be allright. Cause now, i desperately need one.

nb: what took You so long to heal me? is it inappropriate to ask for an instant healing?

thank You
Amen.

The Promotor

for more information www.idolabrisbane.com

The Promotor

for more information www.idolabrisbane.com

bleeds

...

E: How can i convince you?
A: Just stay here and be with me
E: i will. in 2 years time
A: its way too long you know
E: girl, i need you to understand
A: well ..
E: till then, i beg you to never let me go

bleeds

...

E: How can i convince you?
A: Just stay here and be with me
E: i will. in 2 years time
A: its way too long you know
E: girl, i need you to understand
A: well ..
E: till then, i beg you to never let me go

Brisbane Racing Festival

it was bloody hot back then. but i insanely enjoy every second of it. not because it was hot but simply because it was completely fun. not being exaggerating, but yea. had heaps of fun :D

Brisbane Racing Festival

it was bloody hot back then. but i insanely enjoy every second of it. not because it was hot but simply because it was completely fun. not being exaggerating, but yea. had heaps of fun :D

inconsistency

when i was like 5, i really want to be
1. architect
2. astronout
3. radio announcer
4. pilot

n now age almost 20, i really want to be
1. advertising copywriter
2. music video director
3. radio announcer
4. personal shopper

i found 2 things in common there *drum rolls

1. i have four dreams, not actually one. we supposed to be having only one dream to make it focus ey? that is the inconsistency of what i want to be until now which equals to me completely have no idea of what i actually want even at this stage, when i supposed to be sure about it
2. i wanted and still want to be a radio announcer. but screw that, online media kills the radio star. radio is soo traditional way of media, now is the era of online media. *long sigh.

inconsistency

when i was like 5, i really want to be
1. architect
2. astronout
3. radio announcer
4. pilot

n now age almost 20, i really want to be
1. advertising copywriter
2. music video director
3. radio announcer
4. personal shopper

i found 2 things in common there *drum rolls

1. i have four dreams, not actually one. we supposed to be having only one dream to make it focus ey? that is the inconsistency of what i want to be until now which equals to me completely have no idea of what i actually want even at this stage, when i supposed to be sure about it
2. i wanted and still want to be a radio announcer. but screw that, online media kills the radio star. radio is soo traditional way of media, now is the era of online media. *long sigh.

an early morning slap

early conversation back then

Blanche : what have u been up to these days Adhis? havent heard from u for so long
Me : everything seems chaos Blanche :'( miss hanging around with youuu
Blanche : why? what could be going wrong in your wonderful life? you have heaps of achievements, a gorgeous boyfriend, your mom come to visit not long ago, surrounded by good friends, good grades. whats wrong?
Me : well, uhhmm ooh..

so the problem is just me then
i should have answered her:
"nothing Blanche, i just forget how to be grateful"

and i keep playing dramaqueen

an early morning slap

early conversation back then

Blanche : what have u been up to these days Adhis? havent heard from u for so long
Me : everything seems chaos Blanche :'( miss hanging around with youuu
Blanche : why? what could be going wrong in your wonderful life? you have heaps of achievements, a gorgeous boyfriend, your mom come to visit not long ago, surrounded by good friends, good grades. whats wrong?
Me : well, uhhmm ooh..

so the problem is just me then
i should have answered her:
"nothing Blanche, i just forget how to be grateful"

and i keep playing dramaqueen